Inspiration

I Interrupt My Hiatus to Forward This Important Message

Marie A Bailey

I am back from vacation (and already having problems with WordPress but that’s another post).  And I’m still on hiatus from blogging as I (grudgingly) resume the daily grind.  But when I saw this post from Cate Russell-Cole, I had to break my silence.

It chills me that we might have lost Cate this summer.  I knew she was in pain, but I never knew how bad it was.  I am grateful that she was able to get help and she is still with us, and I hope she will be for a long, long time.

I’ve had times when I considered suicide, although for lesser reasons than Cate.  During a period when I had free access to drugs and alcohol, I leaned toward the “accidental” suicide approach, but I was never “successful.”  And to use Cate’s own words, this is why I’m glad I never was successful:  “If I had taken my life when I first considered it, I would have missed out on getting married, great jobs, knowing and loving some awesome people and so very much more.”

If those attempts had been successful, I would have missed out on meeting my husband which means I would have missed out on celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary.  I would have missed gazing up at the wonder of the Milky Way as it came to life over Mono Lake.  I would have missed hiking up through the cinder and ash of Black Point.  I would have missed days of talking and laughing with our friends of 30+ years.  I would have missed the seediness of San Francisco as well as its glory.  I would have missed coming home and holding each of our cats although none of them like to be held.  I would have missed my husband who is my anchor in all things at all times.  I would have missed each of you.  Cate is right.  Life does get better.  Hang in there and reach out.

Published by Marie A Bailey

I am a writer, knitter, cat mama, introvert, bleeding heart liberal, & Floridian via upstate NY and SF Bay Area. My church is in Nature, not religion. I dabble in iPhone photography, leaning toward "two-fers" such as insects on flowers.

25 thoughts on “I Interrupt My Hiatus to Forward This Important Message”

  1. Never, ever consider your reasons lesser. Overwhelm is overwhelm and you are as deserving of help, love and support as I was. Thank you for a beautiful post. It really hurt to write mine and I am comforted to know that someone else may benefit from it.

    Hugs and very best wishes.

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  2. I was thinking of you only yesterday and wondering where you were Marie. I am sorry to hear that you too suffered and I am one of those who has been desperately praying for Cate. Thank you for highlighting her plight in this post but also for your sage advice. Hope to see you back regularly, soon. 🙂

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    1. Thank you, Jade. I hope you and your family are well. Yes, I’ve been severely absent from blogging, for both good reasons (vacay) and bad (day job). I hope to be back in the swim soon 🙂

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  7. What an inspiration you both are. Truly glad you were never successful. Every time I hear about the depression and situations that lead people to contemplate such, I am reminded of my mother and how short her beautiful, but troubled life was and what she missed of this glorious world we share. Peace 🙂

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  8. We have all had dark moments in our life and it’s wonderful that there are such good people around like you Marie, to help others. I’m glad that you were around to enjoy your most recent trip (which sounds fantastic). Hope you’re enjoying your “time off.”

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  10. What a stirring post – I am sorry it had to be written but glad you did so. In my professional life I often worked with people on the brink and have never ceased to be amazed at how just one person can turn the tide for them. It happened for me many years ago and I have never forgotten the community that formed about me at that time.

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